Hi, Jock and Ben,
How are you? As I said before, I start to lead workshop with good friends in Taiwan . Cora and I start lead a workshop for a Depression group. The workshop is held on Friday night in seven weeks. There are 18 members. They suffer from the Depression, family violence, and panic attack.
May I ask you a question？
One of the members who get the Depression, he asked me a question in the class. He said,“When I fall into my dark abyss, sometimes there are no any light that I could follow and allow me to get out the abyss. I try and try, but no where I could go. Would you please tell me, when I sink into the deep hopelessness, beside death, how can I do?
I am blank. I answer him courageously“ I don't know how to answer this serious question. Actually, you failed me. I don't get the Depression, so I don't understand how painful and suffering when you sink into hopelessness. But I am so respect for your suffering experience. I can not answer this question easily.” I invite other members who have had this suffering experience to share their painful feelings and how they find the ladder to seek the light. The feedbacks are burning, many members share their suffering experience. I told them again, I am so respect for their suffering experience. I closed this question with Joann’s life story. I told them Joann’s childhood sad story, but she never gave up her growth and becomes a great teacher to share her suffering experience and love to people. The suffering experience becomes the fertile soil of life to connect people.
After the class, the person who asked me the question, came to me and shake my hands. He gave me a positive feedback. He said that he is so admired and enjoy my teaching.
I am so honor to hear his positive feedback. I can't sleep that night. I hope to share my pleasure to you. When I have problem in workshop, your images emerge in front of me to give me courage, and allow me to be present and honest to people. I hope to express my appreciation to both of you.
But I know, after my agitation, I need to learn from this question.
Would you please share“ How Ben and you will deal with this question when a person who sink into dark hopelessness. Beside death, how can he find a light in the abyss？”
How's your trip in Africa? What kind of people's suffering in Africa?
loved Dodo
Hi Dodo,
Hello from Dubai! Nice to hear from you.
We will be flying back to Canada tomorrow after a wonderful time in Africa and the Middle East. Many things to tell ....
We congratulate you on your work in the Depression group. We respect you very much for your honest in talking with the participant, and telling him your honest experience.
About your question about how we would deal with someone who has a deep depression with difficulty finding the light ...
First of all, we would approach the situation in much the same way you did. We recognize that you asked other group members about their experience, and acknowledged that you did not have the exact experience yourself. This is what we would have done too. For us, the important feature is the "communicating and connecting" ... which you did by asking the others.
To help the client deal with the darkness and to try to find the light, we would probably use either a guided fantasy, taking the person into the darkness, and encouraging him to look around and find a light source somewhere. I might tell him, "Look around and find the door that is closed ... on the door, is the label, 'the source of light' ..." Then I would ask him to open the door and find the light inside. This might not have the desired result of finding the light directly ... but it would possibly bring up something that might lead you closer to the light.
Another approach would be to use gestalt, putting the hidden light on the pillow, and asking the client to talk to the light .... he might say "Light, I can't find you... where are you?" Then ask him to go onto the pillow of the light and have the light talk back to him, and tell him why he is not finding the light. Going back and forth in the gestalt between the client and the light might bring some answers.
These are some ideas that came to us, which we want to share with you.
We will be back in Canada tomorrow after our long trip.
Love,
Jock and Ben
Dear Jock and Ben
I really realize and understand the ways that you suggest me to do. It's hard to express my appreciation. I fell very warm and close to you.
I put your words of wisdom on my blog. I hope you won't mind. I share those words to people who have the will to connect and to learn from you. I took those photos(on my blog) when I had a summer vacation with my family this year in Bali Island Indonesia.
Love,
Dodo.
